I wrote a few weeks ago about how unsettled I have been as of late in regards to the evil I see around me in the world, and I do not use the word "evil" lightly. I see, read, and hear so many things that cause me to lose hope and become discouraged. I've prayed a lot about this and thought a lot about it, too. How can I protect myself and those I love from the evils that so easily discourage me? My answer came in an unexpected way: through the lyrics of a hymn.
The hymn was "Let Us All Press On." I had heard and sung that song probably a million times before. I know the lyrics by heart, and I thought I had learned all there was to learn from that song. But, this time around, with these evils weighing heavily on my mind, these lines stood out to me above all:
"We will heed not what the wicked may say, but the Lord alone we will obey."
When I heard those words, I was struck in my heart by how simple, yet important, the solution to my problem was: Heed not.
It doesn't matter what wicked people say or do. I don't have to let it affect me. I will not heed those things, because the only thing that matters is what the Lord has to say. He is the one I will heed, through the words of the Prophet, through the scriptures, and through my own personal revelation. That's all that I need. I'm so grateful for the peace and clarity that that little piece of inspiration brought me.
Tuesday, April 28, 2015
Friday, April 24, 2015
Letting Go of Regret
My anxious mind likes to remind me often of things that I regret. Things that I've done, things that I've said, and even things that I failed to do. I've struggled with these regrets for a while now. They swirl around in my mind, making me feel unworthy of respect, love, and grace.
About a year ago, I realized that this is completely unhealthy, so I started on a path of letting go of my regrets. It wasn't easy, but I can now see how my regrets are melting away, freeing me from their tyranny.
First, I tackled the regrets that I could still change. I thought about each of them, and asked myself if there was something I could do right now, today to erase that regret and replace it with accomplishment and joy. For some things, it was absolutely possible for me to work hard and erase that regret, and so I did. That was step one.
The next step was a little harder. There were some things from my past that I regretted that I could do nothing to remedy. Those things had happened, and nothing I could do could change it. I want to "fix" them, but I can't. That's where I let the Grace of God and the Atonement of Jesus Christ take over. I prayed fervently and daily for the strength and clarity to be able to move on from those mistakes. And it worked. It worked slowly, but it worked.
What has helped me immensely is constantly reminding myself that I cannot change the past, but that dwelling on it will only cause me to miss out on my present and my future. I've made mistakes. So have we all. But that does not define who I am. Accepting myself, flaws and all, while trying to improve, has helped me to leave my mistakes where they belong: in the past.
This same principle has also helped me to forgive several people for whom I've held a grudge for a long time. They made mistakes, just as I did, and it's okay. How can I expect to be forgiven of my flawed nature if I don't offer the same courtesy to others?
About a year ago, I realized that this is completely unhealthy, so I started on a path of letting go of my regrets. It wasn't easy, but I can now see how my regrets are melting away, freeing me from their tyranny.
First, I tackled the regrets that I could still change. I thought about each of them, and asked myself if there was something I could do right now, today to erase that regret and replace it with accomplishment and joy. For some things, it was absolutely possible for me to work hard and erase that regret, and so I did. That was step one.
The next step was a little harder. There were some things from my past that I regretted that I could do nothing to remedy. Those things had happened, and nothing I could do could change it. I want to "fix" them, but I can't. That's where I let the Grace of God and the Atonement of Jesus Christ take over. I prayed fervently and daily for the strength and clarity to be able to move on from those mistakes. And it worked. It worked slowly, but it worked.
What has helped me immensely is constantly reminding myself that I cannot change the past, but that dwelling on it will only cause me to miss out on my present and my future. I've made mistakes. So have we all. But that does not define who I am. Accepting myself, flaws and all, while trying to improve, has helped me to leave my mistakes where they belong: in the past.
This same principle has also helped me to forgive several people for whom I've held a grudge for a long time. They made mistakes, just as I did, and it's okay. How can I expect to be forgiven of my flawed nature if I don't offer the same courtesy to others?
Wednesday, April 1, 2015
Pros and Cons of Adulthood
There are many things I love about being an adult. I love being able to pretty much do whatever I want, whenever I want. I love being able to eat whatever I want. I love the feeling of satisfaction that comes from knowing that I did something hard "all by myself." However, I have days in which I wish I could be a kid again. Today is one of those days.
Sometimes I feel scared of things that I have to do and decisions that I have to make. When I was a kid, there wasn't much that truly scared me, because I trusted that my mom and dad would take care of me. They'd make all the decisions and do all the hard things so that I could just enjoy my simple life of going to school, playing, and watching TV. I never had to truly worry about anything. Gosh, I miss those days. Sometimes, like today, I wish that I could have someone just swoop in and take care of me, and I mean just let me sit back while they take care of everything.
I understand that I'm an adult and have to take care of myself, and I don't actually expect anyone to take care of me like my mom and dad used to. That time has passed, but I think I'm allowed to be sad and scared and wish someone would come along and say, "Don't worry about it. Just take a nap and I'll take care of everything.
My husband of course takes care of me, but it's not in the same way, and it shouldn't be. We are equal partners and take care of each other.
Anyway, now I'm just rambling. I've just been feeling scared and frustrated today, and writing about my feelings helps me process them. I'll most likely get over it very soon.
Sometimes I feel scared of things that I have to do and decisions that I have to make. When I was a kid, there wasn't much that truly scared me, because I trusted that my mom and dad would take care of me. They'd make all the decisions and do all the hard things so that I could just enjoy my simple life of going to school, playing, and watching TV. I never had to truly worry about anything. Gosh, I miss those days. Sometimes, like today, I wish that I could have someone just swoop in and take care of me, and I mean just let me sit back while they take care of everything.
I understand that I'm an adult and have to take care of myself, and I don't actually expect anyone to take care of me like my mom and dad used to. That time has passed, but I think I'm allowed to be sad and scared and wish someone would come along and say, "Don't worry about it. Just take a nap and I'll take care of everything.
My husband of course takes care of me, but it's not in the same way, and it shouldn't be. We are equal partners and take care of each other.
Anyway, now I'm just rambling. I've just been feeling scared and frustrated today, and writing about my feelings helps me process them. I'll most likely get over it very soon.
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